Tuesday, March 22, 2016

Speaking Life: 7 Affirmations for Prosperity

Every morning, just after my eyes have adjusted to the morning, and my mind has started to come out of the fog of Sleepyland, I start to focus my mind. What will the day bring, I wonder?

Although I don't know exactly how it will end, I do know I have control over how it begins. For me, my best days start off with the focal point of an affirmation.

AFFIRMATION [af·firm·a·tion] - [ˌafərˈmāSH(ə)n]

(NOUN)

def: the action or process of affirming something or being affirmed
synonyms: declaration - statement - assertion - proclamation

To put it another way, affirmations are short statements or assertions creating a positive sense of outlook, direction, peace, courage, joy, etc. These statements - although seemingly small - are very powerful when used regularly to adjust your focus and keep your mindset positive and productive.

Below are seven of my favorite affirmations, offered here for you to decide if you'd like to implement them in your daily routine, too. One note before we begin: I call them "affirmations for prosperity" NOT because they are all about money - far from it. I believe TRUE prosperity is so much more than the amount of money in your bank account; a truly prosperous person has balance in their relationships, is joyful in their daily interactions, feels fulfilled in the work they do, and has a positive outlook and vision for their future. If all those things are in place, financial prosperity usually flows into the picture, too. 

And now, the affirmations.
Affirmation #1:
I have limitless confidence in my abilities

My prosperity depends on my belief in my own abilities. If I do not have confidence in myself, I won't take the chance on a new opportunity or business option. If I have confidence in who I am and my ability to accomplish tasks suited to my strengths, I will be more likely to step out try new things, which could lead to wonderful successes and experiences.

Affirmation #2:
I choose to experience life in a positive way

No matter how life is going, I have the option of experiencing it in a positive way. Even if I am not financially as prosperous as I would like to be, I can experience my current level of financial success in a positive way. I can choose to see all the blessings I already have, instead of focusing on the things I need or want which I don't currently possess. In changing my outlook to one of positive experience, my attitude informs my actions, and I will have the right mindset when the right opportunity comes along which offers a great financial increase.


Affirmation #3:
I abandon old negative habits, 
and instead take up new, positive ones

When I take stock of my life, as I regularly do, I can evaluate my current habits and determine whether they are serving me well, or inhibiting my grown and development. If I find a habit to be a cause of stress, dis-ease or aggravation, I choose to put it aside in favor of a new, positive action. 

 
Affirmation #4:
I am in charge of my life's direction

It is empowering, indeed, to realize that I and I, alone, am in charge of my life's direction. I can choose to move forward at whatever pace I determine, if I keep a positive attitude and an energetic enthusiasm. Conversely, I can choose to move backwards if I focus on negativity. I choose, every day, to be focused in a positive way on where my life is going. I make good life choices, and my life moves in directions of blessing and advancement.

Affirmation #5:
I am blessed to be a blessing

When blessings come my way - and I am blessed every day! - I remind myself that I am meant to be a blessing to others. When I am a blessing to those around me, be they friend or stranger, I receive blessing, too. Blessing others gives me joy, and offers me a sense of peace from doing good for another person. I remember the old saying, "Burdens shared are halved; blessings shared are doubled."

Affirmation #6:
I am no longer available to negative thoughts and fears

I have closed my mind and my heart to the possibility of negativity or fear taking up residence. I am no longer available to the over-dramatic, life-draining thoughts of extreme negativity and the fears that accompany them. Instead, I think positive thoughts and replace my fears with faith.  




Affirmation #7:
I am limited only by my vision of what is possible

When I think of my future, and contemplate where I want to be in six months, a year, three years, I see only positive outcomes. I remember that my future is limited only by what I "see" to be possible. If I look at my future and say "I'll never be able to do that", the despair becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and I will certainly never attain that goal. If, however, I can look with eyes which see the positive outcome before the rest of the world believes it is even a possibility, then my vision will be a driving force for good in my mental conditioning. Proper mental conditioning helps get me to the place where that positive vision is a beautiful reality.

Affirmations are a wonderful way to begin a day, and to maintain a positive, focused outlook all week long. Try these affirmations this week, and move ever faster towards the fulfillment of your biggest dreams!

Sunday, March 20, 2016

The 5 Laws of a Focused Mind

     I swear I'm not a scatterbrain. No - really! Although my [always loving] husband might beg to differ with me on this point, I'm actually pretty good about mental focus. The problem I have isn't the ability to focus, per se, but the reality of the life I live interrupting that focus.

     Take, for example, the beautiful Zen moment of the blogger who has just settled into a lovely rhythm in their writing, and is pounding out prolific and insightful paragraphs on their keyboard... Only to be suddenly interrupted in their task by the crying of their one-year-old son who is waking from a nap VERY hungry and simply demanding to be fed. [Like his Daddy, that boy; always with the feed me NOW!]

     Everything in our world seems to be in constant motion; very little looks to be standing still. We race to get up on time, to get to work; race to complete the tasks of the day, and race home again. Our minds need to focus in order to be able to properly process incoming information, and to handle stress in a positive manner. But with chaos around us - and often, chaos within us - it has become increasingly difficult for us to gain and maintain the level of mental focus needed to achieve our goals.

     Here are what I call "The 5 Laws of a Focused Mind". This is the set of mental rules which help keep me in a focused state of mind. Read on and see if they can help you, too.

LAW #1: Tend to Your Environment

     The first law of focus is to keep your mind peaceful. There are many factors which go into obtaining a peaceful mind, but there is one key area which cannot be neglected if you are seeking to cultivate peace: your environment.

     If your environment is chaotic, your mind will follow suit; it is exceedingly more difficult to focus in surroundings which resemble more of a circus and less of a monastery. Granted, the absolute quiet of the monastic life isn't a possibility for most of us, but then neither is it absolutely necessary. What is necessary is that your environment be free from extreme noise, heavy clutter, and intensely negative emotion. The first two will impact your exterior environment; the latter, your "interior environment"; both will impact your mental capacity to focus.

     Try to keep your external environment tidy, give yourself periods of silence instead of constant noise, and release intense negativity from your mind before it has the chance to set up shop. 

     Say it with me:
 A Peaceful Mind is a Focused Mind


LAW #2: Give Yourself Some R & R

    I know, I know - none of us "have the time" for relaxing these days. I feel you - really, I do. See, the thing is, rest and relaxation are paramount to a focused mind.

     If you are over-tired, your mind can't focus on your daily tasks, let alone your long-term goals. If you are stressed to the point of breaking and cannot seem to get anything done, it's likely time for a relaxing massage or a hot bath.

     And don't give me this whole "I can't rest because X needs me to do Y and if I don't there will be Z to pay!" I have a HUGE problem putting myself first sometimes [ok, MOST of the time], but I've learned through bitter experience that if I am not at my best, all those "X" who depend on me to do "Y" will suffer far more if I DON'T take the time to take care of myself than they would if I took a little time - even a few days - to make sure my own internal batteries were recharged.

     You CAN find the time, and you DO deserve it!

     Say it with me: 
 A Rested Mind is a Focused Mind


LAW #3: Keep Your Mind in Good Shape

    Unless you've been living under a rock for the past, um, millennium, you know the importance of keeping your body in good working order.

     We should eat more fruits and vegetables, and exercise, and sleep well, and only indulge in the occasional doughnut binge. [Can YOU resist those melt-in-your-mouth confections every time? Didn't think so.]

     But what about keeping your MIND in shape? How do we go about that, exactly? Well, I have great news!

     There are some fantastic ways to keep your brain hopping often enough to stay in mental "shape". You may already do a few of them! Here are some fun ways to get some mental aerobics on:
  • play strategic board games like chess 
  • read a book regularly [a REAL book - like, with a plot and everything - no, blogs don't count] 
  • use a mind app like Lumosity and jump through their mental hoops
  • learn something new - take a class online [free ones through sites like www.futurelearn.com are awesome options!]
     You'll find it a lot easier to focus when your mind is getting a regular mental "workout". Say it with me:
 A Fit Mind is a Focused Mind


LAW #4: Stay in the Present Moment

    The temptation to time-travel is almost overwhelming some days. Any random morning, I may find myself overcome with the guilt of a past failure, or with the powerful joy of future possibilities. Focusing on either of these extremes, if I allow myself, will derail my focus for the whole day.

     Memories of our past and dreams for the future will always be there in our minds; the trick is knowing what to do with them when they arise in our active thoughts. The best way I know of to eliminate focus on either the past or the future is to focus - purposefully - on the here and now.

     Try my technique for present-moment focus:
  • Stop what you're doing, and close your eyes. 
  • Concentrate on your own breath; steady your breathing. 
  • Think to yourself of the peace you can feel, in THIS moment. 
  • Release the guilt of failure; we've all failed. Release, too, any over-focus on the future; dreams are important, but if you don't live in today, they will never become your reality tomorrow
  • Think, instead, of three things you are grateful for - RIGHT NOW. Give thanks for them, and then re-orient your mind onto the task at hand with a renewed sense of gratitude and focus. 
Say it with me:
 A Present Mind is a Focused Mind


LAW #5: Accentuate the Positive

    Negative minds cannot create positive focus - it's just that simple. Are you are constantly thinking of your worst breakup ever, or the one time your boss called you out for something not your fault in front of the whole company, or when you had a flat tire, got fired, and your pet fish died all on the SAME DAY? If so, I hate to break it to you, but a mind consumed with negativity like that will never focus long enough to create a peaceful life - let alone a peaceful world.

     That old song whose lyrics advise us to "accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative, latch on to the affirmative - and don't mess with Mr. In-between" shows us exactly how to keep a positive outlook. It sounds SO simple, doesn't it? And it is, really - IF you can do ONE thing: be firm with your negativity. Own it, and let it go. You can't toss out only a few negative thoughts and believe this is enough to create a positive mindset. Nope - they've ALL got to go - every last one of them.

     Try this out the next time you're overwhelmed with a negative thought that is threatening to derail your focus:
  • Acknowledge the negative thought - don't immediately push it away.
  • Respond to the negative thought - internally - with a refusal to let it in - something along the lines of "this was in the past; I do not need to think of it any more".
  • Replace the negative with a positive thought - "I was so hurt back then - BUT I am healed now, and am living a prosperous life in a loving relationship".
     Focusing on the positive - and eliminating the negative - will help your mind focus on what REALLY matters. Say it with me:

 A Positive Mind is a Focused Mind


Listen to George Lucas
[and maybe to me, too.]

    The man is wise beyond the wisdom of mere mortals. I mean, come on, he INVENTED the Jedi!

     But regardless of your love [or lack thereof] for all things Star Wars, I think you'll be able to see the wisdom of his admonition - "Always remember: your focus determines your reality."

     How is this so? It's the simple law of cause and effect at work, really.
  • Cause: negative thoughts about past failed relationships 
  • Effect: not taking the chance on a new, great person because we're afraid "it will end badly like last time".
  • Cause: negative thoughts about our business capabilities
  • Effect: not stepping out when offered an opportunity to become a Junior Partner in your firm, because you "don't think you'd be respected since you don't have as much experience as everyone else"
     When we focus on the negative, more negative comes our way; it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. But if you can focus your mind - and keep it positive - your reality will change in accordance with your focus.

     These 5 Laws of a Focused Mind aren't the be-all-and-end-all of mental focus - far from it. They are, however, a great starting place for you as you seek to master a positive, focused mindset. Master these 5 Laws and you'll be well on your way to changing your life for the better. No Jedi powers needed.

Friday, March 11, 2016

Top 10 Tips to Simplify Your Life

     Life these days is a set of extremes. On the one hand, we have the movement for extreme busy-ness, seen in the circles of folks who run from one activity to another with barely a breath in-between; who don't just multi-task, they QUINTILLION-task! [Like my word, there?] The people we all know who are SO burnt out, they don't even have the energy to REALIZE how exhausted they are. The ones we want to hug, make a cup of tea, and then TIE THEM TO A SOFA until they TAKE A NAP! (Sorry - that's the mom in me, I suppose!)

     On the other side of this coin, is the movement for extreme simplicity - which, I admit, looks AWFUL tempting. Those rare souls who can zen out practically anywhere, have a go-to yoga pose for EVERY problematic issue, and can basically quote every simplicity master out there. The peaceful-faced-people whose perfectly ordered houses are filled with lots of fresh flowers, a few candles, simple but gracious furniture, and soft classical music? The nirvana regulars whose amazing minds are TOTALLY calm?

     You guys? Yeah - YOU are my simplicity idols.

     But what about the rest of the world? Those whose idea of a relaxing night in is networking via Facebook, while watching a new podcast, while eating dinner, while sketching out plans for tomorrow, while mentally taking note of whether or not the emails you sent have gotten as response as of yet, while...

     Ok, I admit it - so MAYBE that's me - at least on SOME nights. So, maybe this blog topic is just as much for me as for you guys. Don't judge. ;)

     What about those of us who need simplicity, but perhaps aren't looking to become a Yogi any time soon? Or who want to learn mindset mastery, but realize that the 5,267,817 tasks we must complete every week, (& that's a SLOW week!), will likely prevent our minds from becoming COMPLETELY calm until probably sometime in 2053?


     Well, I have great news for you! You CAN start to simplify your life - you can even begin THIS WEEK - through employing a few tried-and-true tips and methods to take you out of overwhelm and into a more Zen-like state of mind. (Which is kind of like a "New York state of mind", but with less subway traffic.) 

     To help you get started, here's the list of my TOP 10 TIPS TO SIMPLIFY YOUR LIFE. "But, Jennifer," (I hear you saying), "why only ten? Surely there are MANY more tips you could share?"

     Of course there are! But it would be pretty awful of me to give you SO MANY tips that you become overwhelmed in the process of attempting to assimilate and implement them into your life! Talk about counter-productive! 
  
     For now, let's you and I walk through these 10 tips together, and I want you to keep at them until you MASTER them. I promise I'll write more on this in the future, so you can continue to simplify your life in every crazy, over-stressed, under-rested area!

And now [drumroll, please] - THE TIPS:

     #1 : Create Your Own Top 10

     Begin the process of simplifying your life by creating your own "Top 10" list of the ten most important things in your life. What / who do you value the most? Are there major life goals you would like to accomplish? Determine what are the most important things - to you - and write them down. This is begins setting your mind on the path of simplifying your life.

     #2 :  Start Your Day with TD-3

     No, I don't mean the vitamin, although that is a very important thing to have, too! I mean "To Do x 3", which is your to-do list for the day. ONLY put the three most pressing, major responsibilities / needs / tasks to be accomplished on this short list, and add to it the amount of time you believe each will take. Be sure to do these tasks as early in the day as possible, to ensure their completion. After they are finished, move on to the rest of the tasks of the day with a lighter mind and heart, knowing the most important things are already done.

     #3 : Learn to Single-Task

     We have all heard of the merits of multi-tasking, and we all try it to some degree or another. But what about "single-tasking"? It's difficult sometimes, granted, to concentrate ONLY on ONE particular task, and not begin another until that first one is done. But single-tasking, once mastered, can produce great results! When possible, concentrate only on the task at hand, and dismiss all distractions which come your way. You'll likely find you complete the task in record time, since you're not dividing your attention among several things.

     #4 : Learn to Say NO

     Often we think that in order to be a good or supportive friend / co-worker / spouse / parent / fill-in-the-blank-here, we must say "yes" to everything [or at least MOST everything] that comes to us in the way of requests. Inevitably, we end up super-stressed as our time is stretched to the limit, and often become overwhelmed. We can learn, instead, that giving a polite but firm "no" at times can not only be beneficial to our schedule, but also healthy for our relationships. Give yourself permission NOT to have to do everything everyone asks of you! You ARE allowed to, say, pamper yourself with a bubble bath, instead of having drinks with friends one Friday night. You ARE allowed to go to your child's baseball game, instead of playing a round of golf with the work crowd. Prioritizing YOU and all you hold dear, and respecting your own boundaries with the occasional "no" will be liberating to both your schedule and your mindset. Ok, everyone say it with me, now: "NO!"

      #5 : Routine Does Not Have to Mean Rut

     Establishing routines is a fantastic way to help you simplify your life! Unfortunately, most people may HEAR "routine", but they are THINKING "rut". That kind of thinking often keeps them from even trying to establish a routine, out of the fear that they may instead develop a rut which negatively effects their productivity, instead of being of benefit. The truth is, routines can save time, save energy, even save money! The trick is to develop a routine around a particular timeframe of the day, instead of the WHOLE day or week at once. For instance, a morning or an afternoon routine, or an after-school or bedtime routine for your children. Develop simple, easy to follow routines you can repeat every day or week, and review them periodically to see if any changes need to me made [thus avoiding the RUT!] You'll see your productivity soar!

     #6 : Leave Some White Space

     When making a list of tasks to be completed or an agenda for our week, it's pretty common practice to see just how much we can CRAM in there. Come on, admit it: if you've got an unexpected 10 extra minutes inbetween tasks some days, you inevitably fall back on either surfing the Internet, or staring blankly ahead as if awaiting divine inspiration. We just do NOT know what to do with ourselves and "free time" these days! It's as if we believe any free time at all means you're obviously an unproductive person, bound to fail in everything you do. No! Don't look at me while I'm on a break! You might get the wrong idea and think I'm a slacker! Argh! The boss just glanced my way! I'll never take a break again! I SWEAR!

     Look, if you want to simplify your life, you're going to have to get used to some "free time" every now and then. All work and no play makes ANYONE dull - not just Jack. that "free time" [as if we're out of prison on good behavior] could actually be the difference between meeting or not meeting a big goal. Why? Because that time you get to just BREATHE - to let your mind and body relax and your thoughts to quiet down for a while - helps you become more productive, master your mindset faster, and achieve your goals more consistently.

     Trouble is, that free time is NOT just going to show up on its own. At least at first, free time MUST be scheduled. How? The "white space". No, not the white space of the decorating sort. This white space is just a clever phrase to indicate the spacing between tasks on a list, which indicates how much time you have between them. More white space, more breathing room. Less white space, higher chance for a way-too-young-mid-life-crisis. Make it a point to PURPOSEFULLY leave more white space in your day, even if you begin with only an extra 30 minutes spread throughout the day in 5-minute increments. Trust me, you WILL begin to notice the difference - especially in your stress levels. You'll be amazed at just how far an extra 5 or 10 minutes can go!

   
  #7 : Limit Your Media Consumption

     Ok, this one is tough, I admit. And what - you may be thinking - does media consumption have to do with a simplified life? Well, as someone who has in the past been semi-regularly sucked down the proverbial rabbit hole that is social media, I can tell you from personal experience that too much media consumption is bad for the soul. And the mind... and the eyes... and the butt! 

[Come on, no one likes flat-butt-syndrome! Get up and MOVE, people!] 

     Media consumption can be - and often is - a drain on both our time and our energy. Limiting it can get you more of that "white space" we were just discussing, and give your brain a break from the never-ending parade of the next-most-amazing-thing-you-MUST-click-like-on NOW! Don't misunderstand - I'm not advocating a total absence from the inter-webs, but rather a guided timeframe which you set aside for that purpose. 

     #8 : Use a Simple Weekly Dinner Menu

     I'm a BIG advocate of eating healthy, but I admit used to I struggle to meet my own high standard some weeks. It just seems SO out of reach, doesn't it? Especially when we are inundated with demands on our time left and right - who has the extra time needed to cook a healthy dinner? I've come to the conclusion that this, too, can be accomplished if we just find a way to simplify the process. For me, that meant the usage of a simple, weekly dinner menu.

     Making a list of favorite dinner items you / your family love isn't difficult; neither is creating an accompanying weekly shopping list for those items needed to prepare said dinners. Really, the MOST difficult thing about this idea is creating a couple of hours of "white space" in your schedule were you can do some cooking prep work. There are great resources out there for using the freezer method, the slow-cooker method, the fresh [no cooking needed] method, and more. Doing a bit of research into which method of weekly dinner prep is right for you will pay off big time when you can sit down to a simple, delicious meal in your own home more than NEVER. Believe me, it's worth it.

     #9 : Carry Less Stuff 

     Ok, ladies and gents, we are ALL guilty of this one at some level. How heavy is that purse, girls? And fellas, just what is making all that jingly noise in your over-stuffed jacket and trouser pockets? SIMPLIFY IT. Dump it all out and go through it - at least once a month - and make sure that what you keep with you is NECESSARY, or could actually become necessary while you are out [and not in a zombie-apocalypse kind of way.] Less actual weight in "stuff", less mental baggage. A good rule to live by.

     #10 : It's About Quality, Not Quantity

      Ok, I'm not going to preach here about owning a lot of material belongings. What I will say is that the more we have, the more we stress and worry over it. The point is, what you own, you care about; what you care about, you spend time upon. Go for less in quantity, and higher in quality when it comes to the stuff of life. 

     Simplifying your life doesn't have to be difficult, and those who do so can reap great benefits as you see a reduction in stress, more free time, and a better mental state. Using these ten tips can help you get started on a more simple, rewarding life. 
Get started today!